There are many layers to our being. There is the part of us that feels frightened, the part of us that dances with joy, and there is the part of us that observes all our changing states. One aspect of who we are, or numerous aspects, are salient at any given time.
There is the part of you that binges/abuses food, and there is the part of you that watches yourself while you are doing it. I use the word “binge” but people tend to have different ways of describing this process including emotional eating, grazing, overeating, breaking a diet, mindless eating, etc. If “binge” doesn’t resonate with you but you do resonate with struggling to control your eating in some way, use whatever word or phrase suits you.
Consider the following questions. You can write about them, ponder them, or create some kind of artistic expression around them—
What role does your binging serve in your life?
Is there a pattern to it? Does it follow certain events/emotions?
What aspect of yourself might it represent?
What is its relationship to the part of you that observes it happening?
What would it take for you to give up this behavior? Why aren’t you doing that?